Burger King Just Died To Us.

Ah for the days when a Whopper and fries was fun. Heck, in a way, going to Burger King was fun. It was fun to get out with friends and or family. It was fun to put a paper crown on someone’s head. Every couple of weeks in our mailbox we get a flyer with coupons from Burger King and we sometimes avail ourselves of the deals. Not all the time by any stretch of the imagination, but sometimes.

No more.

We won’t be stepping into Burger King or driving through their property any more.

The reason is that somehow Burger King has decided that it would be a good idea to take the idea of a “Happy Meal” (like the ones from McDonalds) and turn it into something decidedly different.

Happy Meals have been synonymous with fast food for decades, ever since McDonald’s first rolled out its kid-friendly concept in 1979.

But let’s face it, it’s not easy to be happy all day, every day.

Now, Burger King has come up with a new line of meal boxes that honor a full range of human emotions — from totally excited to super sad.

Burger King’s new “Real Meals” launched this week and they come in five different varieties: Pissed Meal (for when you’re mad), Blue Meal (for when you’re sad), Salty Meal (for when you’re a little bitter), YAAAS Meal (for when you literally can’t contain your excitement) and DGAF Meal (for when you really couldn’t care less about anything). They will only be available at select Burger King locations in Seattle, Miami, Los Angeles, New York City and Austin, Texas.

Here’s the ad campaign for it:

Doesn’t that just make you want to go out and have a good time at Burger King?

Doesn’t it make you want to explain to your young kids what “DGAF” (Don’t Give A F***) means?

Or why you are “pissed?”

Burger King partnered with the non-profit organization Mental Health America to increase visibility about issues surrounding mental well-being during May, which is Mental Health Awareness Month.

“A natural extension of encouraging people to ‘be their way’ is encouraging them to ‘feel their way.’ With the pervasive

nature of social media, there is so much pressure to appear happy and perfect,” the chain said in the press release. “With Real Meals, the Burger King brand celebrates being yourself and feeling however you want to feel.” A representative for the fast-food chain confirmed to TODAY Food that a donation was made to Mental Health America but would not specify how much or whether a specific issue was addressed through the contribution.

“Perverse nature of social media?” Did they really go there? Burger King announced this mess of a promotion on social media. Are they too blind to see their own hypocrisy? Aren’t they a company that wants you download the “Burger King app,” and wants you to follow them on Facebook, Twitter and all the other social media sites? I

If social media is somehow “perverse,” then why is Burger King encouraging people to get onto social media so they can promote their stores and products?

Sorry, but somehow we don’t think eating a Whopper should be some statement to the world on mental health issues any more than eating Frosted Flakes (with Tony the Tiger) should be a statement on the environment or Rice Krispies should be a statement on sibling rivalry (with Snap, Crackle and Pop.)

Sometimes, a meal is just a meal.

And frankly, if you don’t want to encourage people to wallow in self pity or something like that, do something that raises their spirits.

At participating locations, customers may order any box they want but what, exactly, is in a Real Meal?

Every Real Meal is basically some type of Whopper-with-fries combo (which the guest chooses) and, unlike Happy Meals, these are not being targeted at young kids. Unfortunately, none of the Real Meals come with a toy. (emphasis ours)

No toy? What is wrong with these people?

Wouldn’t if have been better for Burger King to make an effort to raise the spirits of people rather than have them take a box of food back to a table, home or car which focuses on how they feel? Especially if that feeling is highly negative? Staring a a box with your emotions on it for the world to see is going to make things better?

Talk about virtue signaling from Burger King.

We aren’t saying that you should support this marketing program from Burger King. We are saying that we won’t. There are too many other places out there in the world of fast food where we can eat a meal in peace and enjoyment and not have to have issues thrust in our faces.

If Burger King wants to play that game that’s fine.

It’s just that we aren’t playing with them.

PS: Think of the pleasant idea of standing in line with your young children when someone up ahead is asked what they would like, and the customer replies “I don’t give a f***.”

“Is that f****** meal for here or to go?”


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