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Currently Browsing: You Can’t Make This Up

Whoa!

This is amazing.

An autonomous vehicle shaped a bit like a torpedo, striped with yellow, green, and black, floats harmlessly through the gorgeous blue waters off Guadalupe Island. It hums quietly in the water, six cameras capturing the beautiful nothingness around it.

Then, from nowhere, a white shark rises up into the frame.

Read the whole story here.

Makes you want to go swimming in the ocean, doesn’t it?



What Were They Thinking?

Drunk-Driving-Taco-Bell-ROHUriel Juarez-Popoca was a man of Mexican descent who was in this country illegally. We use the past tense because Uriel Juarez-Popoca is dead after an encounter with Deputies from the Deleware County (Ohio) Sheriff’s Office.

On July 28, 2012, the police found Juaraz parked along the side of the road intoxicated.

You can conjure up your own stereotypical image of a drunken, illegal immigrant Mexican because that is what the deputies did. Not only did they think that, they acted upon it.

The deputies are seen on a dash camera trying to communicate with Juaraz who, because of being drunk and or limited English skills, did not communicate back with them.

The cops then started to make jokes saying that Juarez might be better understood at a Taco Bell.

The joking continues after Juaraz is handcuffed and placed in the back of a police cruiser.

What happens next boggles the mind:

Deputies did not take him to jail, but instead, drove him to the Taco Bell at I-71 and state Route 36/37. They allegedly told him to call someone for a ride home.

“It’s hard to speculate, but obviously, the officers did not want to take him to jail, for whatever reason,” said Joe Mas, a Columbus attorney. “Or that they just wanted to be kind, and unfortunately, the circumstances developed otherwise.”

Restaurant employees then called 911 three times to say that Juarez Popoca was drunk and walking around the restaurant.

Are you laughing yet?

Isn’t it funny that the police took the drunk illegal Mexican to a Taco Bell and left him there?

Here’s the real punch line though:
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AT&T Doesn’t Quite Get This “Spam” Thing.

ATT-Fire-ROH If you are AT&T, a large communications company, you should know that spam – unwanted and unsolicited emails – is a plague on most email accounts.

We have several email accounts of which one is our “super secret, private, home” account. There are very few people who have the address and we only give it to certain companies for the purposes of billing.

After all, who wants to miss an online bill or a conformation that a bill has been paid?

Last month we signed onto the web version of AT&T’s email service (now run by Yahoo!). We don’t do that often because we access email through a different program most of the time, but we were away from home and wanted to check what was in the email account.

Because the account is not well known, we get very little spam on it. We were somewhat curious as to what was in the “spam folder” on the web version of AT&T’s mail interface.

Amazingly, there was only one email in folder. The email was from AT&T itself confirming our online payment. Call us crazy, but we don’t consider that “spam.”

So maybe that was a mistake, right? After all, no one is perfect.

Before we left for the holidays this past week, we paid bills, one of which was to AT&T.
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It Takes A Busybody.

Via KARE in North Dakota comes this tale of a woman who has decided that not only is she the arbitrator of what is “obese,” but also what makes a good parent.

The woman has decided to hand out the following letter instead of candy to some Trick or Treaters:

Halloween Nutcase Letter

The text of the letter reads:

Happy Halloween and Happy Holidays Neighbor!

You are probably wondering why your child has this note; have you ever heard the saying “It takes a village to raise a child”? I am disappointed in “the village” of Fargo Moorhead, West Fargo.

Your child, in my opinion, is moderately obese and hould not be consuming sugar and treats to the extent of some children this Halloween season.

My hope is that you will step up as a parent and ration candy this Halloween and not allow your child to continue these unhealthy eating habits.

Thank you.

Really?

Are you kidding us?

Apparently not:

I just want to send a message to the parents of kids that are really overweight… I think it’s just really irresponsible of parents to send them out looking for free candy just ’cause all the other kids are doing it,” the woman said in a morning radio interview with Y-24. She wouldn’t identify herself.

At least the “village” of Fargo Moorhead doesn’t have to wonder where it’s “idiot” lives.

While the woman wants us to remember one saying we also remember the saying “Trick OR Treat.”

Here’s hoping the “village” and the kids of that village show her the “trick” part.

Not that we would ever advocate the infamous flaming bag of dog poo, t.p.’ing the woman’s home and yard, etc., but we wouldn’t stop someone from doing it either.

Where do these people come from?

(h/t This Ain’t Hell)



Things We Never Would Have Suspected – The Canine Edition.

Fidos-Bowl---ROH Imagine your dog (or cat, we suppose) came running up to you in your living room like Lassie and started barking.

“What’s that you say, girl?

Woof!

“The house is on fire?”

[Terry and Shay Weisbrich], who are retired, suspect they might have lost the house on a notably hot, dry and breezy May Day had they not been at home when their dog, Toby, a flat-coated retriever, began to bark excitedly.

“This dog does not bark,” Terry Weisbrich said.

His wife walked about to investigate what Toby was worked up about. Through a glass door at the rear of the house she noticed what she first thought was steam but quickly realized was smoke.

She shouted to her husband, “We’ve got a fire!”

The Weisbrichs called 911 and the Bennett Valley Fire Department responded to a extinguish the small fire that started on the couple’s cedar siding. No one was harmed and the house was safe, but the question remained “what started the fire?”
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Meanwhile, Just South Of The Mason Dixon Line…..

There are some strange things that are happening in the state of Maryland these days.

First is the curious decision the University of Maryland Board of Regents made to leave the Atlantic Coast Conference and move to the Big Ten. Err….. the “Big 10 We Can’t Count and Have 12 Members Conference” which is soon to become the “Big 10 We Can’t Count and Have 14 Members Conference” as Rutgers is said to be making the move as well.

Maryland is a founding member of the ACC and their leaving the conference is beyond disappointing. The move is simply for money as the Big Ten television contract adds about $25 million dollars to the revenue of each school. Yet there is something wrong about leaving a great conference that you helped found and supported for all these years for a conference that you have no ties to. To us it is like divorcing your wife of 50 years in order to marry a mail order Russian bride whoyou have not seen or spoken to.

Speaking of Russia and vodka. (Yeah, that is not a smooth segue, but we tried.)

The Distilled Spirits Council of the United States has told state officials the new increased sales tax on alcohol has had a negative effect on sales in Maryland.

David Ozgo, chief economist for the Distilled Spirits Council of the United States, said the sale of distilled spirits in Maryland has grown just two-tenths of a percent in the past year, well below the national average of 3.1%.

“Distilled spirits growth in Maryland has been anemic so far in 2012,” Ozgo said. “Nationwide, off-premise sales are up 3.3 percentage points. But here in Maryland, we are actually off slightly.

There is very, very strong evidence that poor performance of Maryland package stores is a direct result of the Maryland decision to increase the alcohol sales tax to 9% in 2011.”

The liquor sale decline in Maryland can be directly associated with the sale increases in neighboring states, Ozgo said. Virginia’s off-premise sales are up 5% in 2012, while Delaware has seen a staggering 8.8% rise.

You mean people will go to another state to save money because of a new tax? Who would have ever thought that? Who would have ever suspected taxes affect economic growth?

Why was there an increase in taxes?
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“I Threw A Sandwich And It Didn’t Even Hit The Worker….” When Food Is A Weapon.

Amy Corey of Ohio was not a happy woman.

When she and her fiance visited a local McDonalds in Chillicothe, Ohio, Ms. Corey was less than thrilled with the quality of food she received and decided to fight it out with the McDonald’s employee manning the drive through window.

Corey’s weapon of choice?

A chicken sandwich.

Corey said that the chicken sandwich was fried instead of grilled and was missing key condiments, like bacon and cheese. She said the cashier was rude to her when she tried to return the sandwich.

“It had a dab of mayonnaise on it, rotten lettuce,” Corey said.

The employee returned the sandwich with the correct condiments and additions, but with the same fried – not grilled – chicken.

Corey threw the sandwich back at the McDonalds’ employee.

Why did she throw the sandwich? Because obviously a flying sandwich trumps a rude employee, of course.

The employee one-upped Corey and called the police.

The employee declined to press charges (assault with a chicken sandwich we would guess) but Corey was banned from all area McDonalds. She Corey feels the banning is unjust. Her reasoning is priceless:

“I threw a sandwich and it didn’t even hit the worker,” Corey said. “Why would I be banned from McDonald’s? It’s wrong.”

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Wind Turbines Causing Warmer Temperatures.

The state of Texas does everything on a large scale. Texans take great pride in that fact. “Go big or go home,” seems to typify the Texan state of mind.

This means that Texas is home to four of the world’s largest wind farms. Given the open spaces, the winds and the Texas propensity for doing thing bigger than the rest of the world, large wind farms should be found in Texas.

But there appears to be a problem.

New research finds that wind farms actually warm up the surface of the land underneath them during the night, a phenomena that could put a damper on efforts to expand wind energy as a green energy solution.

Researchers used satellite data from 2003 to 2011 to examine surface temperatures across as wide swath of west Texas, which has built four of the world’s largest wind farms. The data showed a direct correlation between night-time temperatures increases of 0.72 degrees C (1.3 degrees F) and the placement of the farms.

“Given the present installed capacity and the projected growth in installation of wind farms across the world, I feel that wind farms, if spatially large enough, might have noticeable impacts on local to regional meteorology,” Liming Zhou, associate professor at the State University of New York, Albany and author of the paper published April 29 in Nature Climate Change said in an e-mail to Discovery News.

This means the wind turbines may actually be harming the climate rather than helping it. In addition to the effects on climate and weather, the warming of temperatures at night will affect growth of grasses, trees, and other plants in the area to say nothing of affecting agriculture. livestock and the need for more energy use at night to cool homes and businesses.
(more…)

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